


warm lattes (with an extra shot of espresso)

by fancyjeong



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: F/F, Pining, sahyo, sahyo are so soft ...
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-05
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-18 16:06:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29860617
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fancyjeong/pseuds/fancyjeong
Summary: “love is so stupid but i want it so bad.”in which sana just wants to be loved (preferably by park jihyo, but she thinks she’ll be fine even if jihyo doesn’t love her) (she’ll realise later that she was very wrong about that)
Relationships: Minatozaki Sana/Park Jisoo | Jihyo
Comments: 3
Kudos: 51





	warm lattes (with an extra shot of espresso)

jihyo reminds sana of coffee. more specifically, of warm lattes with an extra shot of espresso. 

sana’s not quite sure when she started realising this — that whenever she steps into a cafe she’ll think of jihyo. perhaps it’s because that’s where they spent the most time together. memories of staying up at night, downing cup after cup of caffeine a few nights before final exams started; it all seems too long ago. sana still finds herself smiling foolishly at these memories, still keeps the picture she had taken of jihyo as she was sound asleep then. 

that had been nearly a year ago now. sana’s not sure when she started noticing everything about jihyo, from the way she picked different accessories each day to match her outfit to the way she spoke and smiled and laughed. she’s not sure when her chest started to tighten whenever she sees jihyo, and she’s not really sure why her cheeks become as red as they do whenever jihyo so much as puts an arm around her. 

sana accepts it with an open heart, embraces the way jihyo makes her feel without many questions. she doesn’t bother fighting it, or pretending the feelings don’t exist. she likes jihyo (a lot), and she’s okay with that. 

she can never really explain how everything feels — she learns of this when momo won’t stop pestering her about how she’s been acting so strange lately. some feelings are easy to describe; the way she smiles when jihyo smiles, how she feels the cliché butterflies in her stomach, how she stumbles over her words sometimes when she’s talking to jihyo. other feelings are harder to explain, and sana thinks it’s better this way. she thinks not everything should be thought about too deeply, for fear that it won’t be as special again. sana can’t explain the little things that change when jihyo is around, nor does she understand why it seems to be so. she can’t really describe how everything seems to glow just a little brighter with jihyo around, and why she sometimes gets light-headed in jihyo’s presence. 

perhaps sana just doesn’t understand love at all.

it’s rather simple to her, yet she finds herself thinking about it for hours before she falls asleep. she lies there under the moon’s dim light, contemplating about how love is such a vague word. because how is she supposed to know what it feels like to love someone? the word love is used so commonly she sometimes thinks it’s lost its magic. she concludes after countless nights of thinking that she’ll never really know what love is, or whether she truly loves the people around her, and if they truly love her too. she finds peace in the fact that although she’ll never know love, she knows that she wants to find it. preferably in the form of jihyo’s arms around her waist and lips on her forehead, but sana thinks she’ll be fine even without those things. 

sana poses this question to jihyo, because she’s the smartest person sana knows (and also because she’s just curious about everything jihyo thinks about, but she doesn’t mention that). 

jihyo takes a moment to consider the question, before she replies thoughtfully, “i guess it’s more of a realisation than a feeling. when you realise you’d be willing to do nearly everything for someone. that you’d be happy for them as long as they were happy even if you weren’t. but you’re right, too. it’s much too vague of a word to encompass just how much one can feel for someone else. almost like the feeling itself is bigger than the word. it’s strange, isn’t it?”

sana nods and smiles slightly at jihyo’s reply. it made a lot of sense to her, and she briefly wonders if her and jihyo share the same opinions on many other things — topics they had never had the chance to bring up during their conversations. 

sana returns excitedly to her and momo’s shared dorm room that day, embracing the warmth that spreads in her chest from spending time with jihyo. momo can’t get a word in as she rambles on about jihyo, and how  _“the way her mind works is incredible!”_.  as it always does whenever sana talks about jihyo, she ends up sighing. 

“why do things work this way, momo?” 

her best friend shrugs, “i wish i knew, sana.” 

“love is stupid, isn’t it?” sana says, pouting. “so many people crave for it, but why?” 

“maybe we all just want to feel wanted, to be accepted by someone who knows all of you and accepts that.” 

“love is so stupid but i want it so bad.” sana sighs again, and she considers momo’s words. perhaps she was right; that sana just wants to feel wanted, to be accepted without judgements. come to think of it, sana’s always kind of wanted that. she wants to be needed, wants to be missed by someone whom she misses just as much. but that’s all it is — things that she  wants. 

and perhaps sana starts to have an inkling of what love is — it feels a little like warm lattes with an extra shot of espresso. 

sana thinks about how it could be. sometimes she thinks about how jihyo’s hands would feel clasped in her own. she thinks about the way jihyo laughs at her stupid jokes, even if they were really bad. she thinks about how jihyo pretends to hate it when she shows affection towards her, but secretly smiles fondly afterwards. she seems to do this a lot recently — think about jihyo. sana thinks it could be the best feeling in the world, to be loved by jihyo. she has so much love and affection to give, sana can only imagine what it could be to receive even a small part of that. 

maybe she’s being stupid, to think about these things. to wish to be anything more than friends with her. she so desperately wants to be loved, to know what it feels like. sana can’t quite seem to get why she’s so obsessed with wanting to feel love. she’s not lonely, but she just thinks that things could be better with jihyo around. 

/

sana loves the way jihyo speaks. how eloquent she sounds, the words seeming to flow ever so smoothly off the tip of her tongue. how every word she speaks feels like it’s laced with a touch of  _ something  _ sana can never quite figure out. sana loves having conversations with jihyo. she loves the way jihyo speaks so formally at times, when she’s talking about something she’s passionate about. 

maybe that’s why sana keeps striking up mind-stimulating conversations with her, even if she doesn’t really have an opinion on half of the topics she brings up. but seeing the way jihyo’s eyes light up when she engages her in these conversations, sana thinks it’s all worth it. she wouldn’t expect anything less of a psychology major, after all. sana could never understand how jihyo’s mind worked — being a business major meant she only ever made sense of numbers and statistics, not how people think and act. 

but sana thinks it’s so very interesting how jihyo’s mind works. sana has never been more interested in getting to know someone like she has with jihyo. every time she discovers something new about jihyo, she’s thrown in for another loop; jihyo is always full of unexpected surprises. 

“what do you think about dreams?” sana leans forward, resting her chin on her hand as she looks at jihyo. 

“dreams? i’m not sure, honestly. i do enjoy them very much, though. they could be the most absurd, ridiculous things but they could also be the best things. and it’s somehow weird to think that it’ll all be gone as soon as we open our eyes.” this. it’s the things like this that make sana all the more intrigued in jihyo. 

“what are the best dreams for you, then?” 

“i like ones where people i know appear in them. people like you, and it’s a wonderful dream of happiness and laughter.”

sana nearly chokes on her drink. “y-you dream of  _me_? ”

“of course i do. it seems that even when i’m asleep i still think about you.” jihyo smiles softly, seemingly unaware of sana’s internal panic. she stumbles to form a coherent sentence, but all she does is stare at jihyo, trying her best to ignore the way her heart feels like it might burst. “can i ask you something, sana?” 

sana nods slowly, taking in small breaths and hoping jihyo doesn’t mention how red her whole face seems to feel. 

“do you perhaps... like me?”

sana stills, hands trembling in her lap as she wills them to stop. 

“i- o-of course, we’re friends, aren’t we?” she says the first thing that comes into her mind. 

“i meant romantically, not platonically.” jihyo clarifies. there’s no way for sana to get out of this now.  _ why would she ask this now, out of all times?  _ it’s stupid, really. sana could’ve gotten over her, she really could. maybe in a few years’ time. still, she could’ve survived a few more years’ worth of pining and longing. not the wisest of choices, but what else was she supposed to do, when jihyo’s just her friend and nothing more? 

“i-“ sana starts, already feeling the dread. she could lie and pretend she never did like jihyo, but it seems impossible for her to do so as jihyo watches her with those eyes of hers, so warm and comforting. “would you hate me if i said i did?”

jihyo frowns at this, “of course not. rather, i would be flattered,” she tilts her head, as if she were taking in every movement sana dares to make. “after all, it’s not every day that a pretty girl falls for you.” she grins, ignoring the way sana sits up even straighter in her seat, the way her breathing quickens. 

“you don’t want to end our friendship or anything like that?” sana asks, beyond bewildered, because she couldn’t have imagined that this would be the way jihyo found out about her feelings. 

“no! why would i?” jihyo exclaims from opposite her, sounding as if sana had just said something absolutely unthinkable. “ah, perhaps it’s because i never returned your acts of affection? is that why you think i’d hate you if you liked me?” 

_how could jihyo read her like a book so easily every single time?_

“well, i’d like to have you know that i, too, like you very much,” jihyo continues. “romantically.”

she smiles gently, taking sana’s trembling hand in hers. 

sana feels the comfort of jihyo’s love for the first time. it’s warm, and everything sana could ever have imagined. it feels like warm lattes with an extra shot of espresso. 

**Author's Note:**

> @nynluvr on twt!


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